Storm Front

Tell me, as we all swelter through this year's first heat wave, what's the hottest you've ever been? 

For me, what springs to mind first is the summer between tenth and eleventh grade, when I went to Princeton for an intensive ballet program.  We stayed in Pyne Hall, one of the dorms on campus that was built in like 1703 and, as such, lacked air-conditioning (and had a bit of a roach problem to boot).  We had to walk almost a mile to the ballet studios, which, incredibly enough, also were not air-conditioned. 

Naturally, it was one of the hottest summers on record, well over 90 most days and cresting past 100 for over a week, and before we did our first plie of the morning, we were sweating our bony butts off.  For six to eight hours a day, we took class, our tights and leotards becoming a second skin, saturated and translucent and oh-so-fragrant, our slicked-back hair dripping rivers of sweat into our eyes.  At lunch we'd dump liters of cold water over our heads, trying to get the slightest relief from the steaming air of the studios.  When the day ended and we shouldered our dance bags, we'd slog to the cafeteria, which was -- hallelujah -- air-conditioned.  We stayed there as long as the cleaning staff would let us after the meal hours had long since ended, then wander back to Pyne Hall, to the roaches and the choking heat and a sleepless night on smothering sheets.

Then there was Vietnam.  Oh, man, is it ever hot in Vietnam.  I mean, I grew up in Georgia and obviously am no stranger to heat, but I swear it was even hotter in Vietnam than in the dead August of a Southern summer.  You just kind of accept that you're going to be drenched in sweat wherever you go, and plenty of places have A/C, so it's not the end of the world.  Riding on a bus for ten hours without air, on the other hand, is not the best feeling in the world.

On my trip to VN after the bar exam, my friends and I took a bus from one city to another -- I can't even remember which two cities, because the memory of the discomfort has blocked out everything else about that span of time.  It was one of those tourist buses you sign up for at a little backpacker cafe, where they've got Internet access and Western-style meals and day trips to popular destinations around the country as well as cheap connections between cities.  We were promised air-conditioning.  We didn't get it. 

We boarded the bus with about 95 Europeans, each carrying a backpack the size of a Volkswagon.  There was so much luggage that we had to put our duffels under our feet and hug our knees to our chests, and the people sitting in the very back of the bus had to spend the duration of the trip facing backward, holding the wall of backpacks up so as not to be crushed under all that dirty laundry and Lonely Planet guides and cheap souvenirs.  The driver started the bus and we all waited for that welcome rush of cool air, but it never came.  As we pulled out of wherever it was, the driver's assistant came around to collect tickets and explained that the air was broken.  I would have leapt out of the window if I could have opened it more than two inches.

For what seemed like years, we drove through the countryside, which was stunningly beautiful but we could hardly see it through the haze of body odor.  My shins were pressed against the vinyl seat back ahead of us, and my calves were glued to my thighs; my butt was numb from being unable to change positions for hours on end.  I thought I would lose my mind from the heat and discomfort.  I tried to get through each minute, barely able to comprehend that I wouldn't be released from the bus for many, many hours. 

Uh.  There is a freaking crazy-ass storm happening right now, with lightning that keeps changing the sky from pink to green to blue, and the wind is screeching by in a highly threatening manner.  Has there ever been a tornado in Manhattan?  Because I think there might be one coming now.  I'm going to get off the computer now, before the Wicked Witch goes riding by and something comes through the screen to electrocute me. 

The point of my story, anyhow, was that it was hot.  Really hot.  I think you probably gathered that.

Do tell me about the hottest you've ever been, though.  And also how to survive a tornado when you're on the ninth floor. 

Comments

[jjm]

Vietnam is pretty hot...

In 1997 I took a road trip to Memphis with the future hubster and some pals to see Mozart's Magic Flute (the Opera people, that's not innuendo). The heat was oppressive and the theatre where we saw the opera was historic (ie. completely void of modern conveniences) so no cool air. Did I mention that this was a black tie optional event and that we were are seriously dress, and coiffed, and perfectly made up? I spent 3 and a half hours with sweat ruining my gorgeous dress and completely saturating my bra, hoping, just hoping, that one of the singers would get over zealous with the German consonants and mist me with some spit. That's right, so effing hot that I was hoping to be spat upon. Gross. Once the torture ended we made our way to the car through air so steamy and dense that you had to chew it before you could breathe, only to find that it wouldn't start. Somebody jumped it or something and we we ready for the air conditioning. Sweet, sweet air conditioning... no dice. The air conditioner refused to comply. Not so much as a fan moving sweltering air. Nada. So we got on the highway, settled in for a long 3 hour drive home, and rolled down the windows to let the searing hot air blow through the car. That's when it started to rain. Worst. Day. Ever.

In our case the crazy heat was the result of a massive storm system that flattened 95% of my Dad's neighborhood that night. Compared to hunkering down in the bathroom floor under a mattress with two giant dogs, three adults, and four kids as a tornado sucks the roof off of the house, I'd say being pissed off and sweaty isn't so bad.

It was damn hot though.

[Beth]

Ugh. Last summer the neighborhood power went out around 3:00 p.m. and the power company said it would be back on in an hour. Then they said another hour. Then another. Then 12 hours. My son and I tried to sleep with all the windows open, but the air was about 100 degrees and we just lay there in our sweat. I kept thinking, "Well, I know I can't turn on the AC, so I'll just turn on a fan." Doh. I spent the night alternately fanning my son so he could sleep, and lying on the couch downstairs, reading a magazine by flashlight until he'd restlessly call for me again. I don't think I slept at all. My next-door neighbor slept out on his deck, which was probably a bit more comfortable, but I didn't feel secure about that option for me and my boy. When morning came and the power finally went back on, my son and I literally danced with joy...then turned on the AC.

[Inzaburbs]

New Caledonia. My tenth birthday. We spent a week in a cheap hotel with no air conditioning and my parents frog marched us through the heat around all the tourist sites. That is, when we weren't sitting on humid, stinky buses.
They asked the chef to make me up a special birthday cake but I was so sick I couldn't eat a bite of it. Happy Birthday to Me.

[Leigh]

If you'd have only added three crying babies, stinky-sleepy-druggy girl passed out in the back seat, and having white-knuckles from gripping the seat in front of you while you sang "Jesus Take The Wheel" in your mind...I'd have sworn we shared the same bus to Ha Long Bay!

Can't wait till you are sweltering in Vietnam again!

[Floyd]

I am sitting in Atlanta right now and I swear it feels like the hottest ever (96 degrees). I know it's not the hottest I've ever been because I went to law school in Mississippi and that was hellish hot. You would start sweating almost the minute after you dried off from a shower. Ick.

[Becky]

Our stories are similar... I was in cheerleading camp my freshman year in high school. We were outside all day (with zero shade) practicing cheers, dances, tumbling passes, and 'builds.' It was truly torture. Of course the dorms weren't air conditioned either. Ugh.

I think I could get heat stroke now, just from the memory!
:) Becky
http://stinkylemsky.typepad.com/

[sjb]

A couple summers ago we lost power in the middle of a heatwave... for 8 days. It hit 100-105+ with killer humidity nearly every day and we hung out in restaurants, the mall, overstayed our welcome with friends, basically did anything we could to be out of the house between 8am and midnight. It was so hard to sleep, even with windows open the air just sat there all heavy and wet. Three days in to this horror, the whole neighborhood got power back except for our street; apparently we're on some tiny circuit that is the last one the power company fixes since it only affects 100 people out of 60,000 without power. Before AC was invented, I seriously wonder how anyone got anything done in June-September south of the mason-dixon line.

[rachel]

Quick, go to your basement! haha..sorry. I really have no idea what one is supposed to do 9 stories up if a tornado comes through.

The stifling Russian Market in Cambodia is probably THE hottest thing I have ever survived. It was probably 95+ degrees outside, complete with SE Asian humidity. Combine that with a low ceiling building, no air circulation, masses of people swarming through the narrow aisle...PLUS, I was wearing Ava in the baby bjorn. I seriously thought I was going to die of heat stroke. And I'm sure I was quite a sight to the Cambodian people, as my face was probably the color of a cherry tomato. I felt like such a wimpy American.

[Cami]

The hottest I have ever been was in August of 1992. Hurricane Andrew blew through Miami and demolished our city. We were amazingly lucky in that my parents' home suffered no damage what so ever. I chalk this up to the hand of God, because neighbors all around them lost their roofs, their doors, windows etc. Regardless, Miami, in August with heat in the mid-nineties and 100% humidity makes hell look like a welcoming place. We were without power for about 2 months or so. The air was so thick and stagnant that you felt like you were choking and your entire body was continuously dripping sweat. I remember a few nights when we just could not take it anymore, we all piled into my parents car in the driveway, turned the car on, blasted the A/C and then went to sleep. I hope we dodge the bullett again this hurricane season because I equate all hurricanes with the terror and despair that we suffered through with Hurricane Andrew.

[Leah]

The hottest I've ever been was on my first trip to New York, in the dead heat of summer 2004. I was waiting for the subway on Lexington, fanning myself with a map, and feeling absolutely no relief. The air was GOOEY with heat and I thought I was going to die. Humidity pretty much extinguishes my will to live.

The second hottest I've ever been was, suprise, during a dance performance at, of all places, a waterpark. Between numbers, we had to change costumes inside camping tents set up on the grass, and hello, welcome to my sweltering greenhouse! Having trouble getting your tights on? I remember thinking "Golly, that was sure hot," and then I looked at the temperature reading on a sign and saw that it was 106. Oh, but it was a "dry heat."

[Chris]

August 1998. Hoover Dam. We had toured the cool, shady innards of the dam when at 2pm it was time to come out in the middle of two gigantic cement walls, the sun blazing mercilessly onto the cement floor. The temperature: 134

[Allison]

Either the day at the zoo in Guangzhou or Yuntai Park, also in China. I have never been so hot in my life and Maggie was still refusing to sit in the stroller so we had her strapped to us in the Hip Hammock and a 50 pound backpack of baby "necessities." The humidity was about a thousand percent.

Or, I guess any of the summers in south Georgia when my parents refused to turn on the a/c until JULY 4.

[JudithNYC]

I don't remember the hottest I have ever been but the angriest I have ever been is yesterday (6/10) when the friend I had not seen in 12 years was visiting from Oregon. She kept insisting I bake her a cake (right before the storm broke). That's right after I had fixed a five course dinner because she refused to have a pasta salad for dinner, she freaking needed a hot meal!!

[JudithNYC]

I don't remember the hottest I have ever been but the angriest I have ever been is yesterday (6/10) when the friend I had not seen in 12 years was visiting from Oregon. She kept insisting I bake her a cake (right before the storm broke). That's right after I had fixed a five course dinner because she refused to have a pasta salad for dinner, she freaking needed a hot meal!!

[jen w]

Summer of 98 in raleigh, nc. Grooming horses at fairgrounds- solid concrete, no trees, no air movement. That, and summer of 04 after the hurricanes in south FL. No a/c for 3 weeks. That was awesome.

[jessica v]

Good news. the bus you will ride on in Vietnam is MUCH better. Plenty of AC and much more room.

As for Heat. I was born in Texas and have lived in Florida for 19 years. need I say more.

It was 97 this past Saturday..... and the AC died in my mini van. Oh, and the power window on the driver side was dead too. So all we could do was put down the passenger side window. I kid you not when I say it was at least 115 in there. Needless to say I bought a new van on Sunday.

On another note please don't kill me for the email I sent you. It is nothing personal. I sent it out in hopes of inspiring people to do their homework before they vote.

[Lara]

Oh man. The hottest I have ever been was in the summer of 1993 when my high school friends and I went to New Orleans for Lollapalooza (we had just graduated, which is the only reason our parents let us go alone). It was outdoors in the middle of summer and so hot and humid, I thought I was going to die. Later that summer, I ran into an acquaintance who said she saw me there, and then she said something like, "Yeah, you were SO MESSED UP, what did you take, acid?" Um, I don't do any drugs, and all I'd had to drink was water. I was just f-ing HOT.

[Heather M.]

I must admit that Vietnam is the hottest place I've ever been. The sticky heat just doesn't even compare...not even to our Texas summers. However, band camp with no air-conditioning out in the boonies comes really close. Can you say MISERABLE! It was horrible.

Heather M.

[Kim]

Well, I think I agree with Heather, Vietnam is the hottest place I have been. But, summer camp in Ardmore, OK during late July with no air conditioning is pretty dang hot too!

Btw, when you are on the 9th floor and a tornado is coming...my dad would say to bend over and kiss your rear goodbye!

[molly]

oh, Vietnam is the hottest place I have been. It was insanely hot last month when I was there, so much so that I was trying to think of hotter circumstances. I had more "pure" heat in California (central valley in summer = 112 degrees) but that was not as uncomfortable as Vietnam. Or even, New York in August. But Vietnam still wins.

[Paula]

Okay, so Vietnam is hot, but we've been pretty lucky. I was ready for it to be horrifically hot, so it's been a pleasant surprise to only be sweltering! :)

The worst for me - Washington, D.C. in July. I wanted so badly to see the sites on the National Mall, and I thought I might die in the line for the Declaration of Independence. Death by history - how ironic! Seriously, the people walking along the Mall actually moved slower, like ants, because it was so hot - about 105 with like 900% humidity (ha, ha!) We went to Mount Vernon and I kept thinking that his patriotism must've been so strong, because I would've chucked it all and sailed back somewhere cooler!

[Paula]

P.S. - 79 degrees in Saigon right now at 4:15 p.m. Hue was more brutal - 95 degrees with a heat index of "Let's take a nap under the fan each afternoon!" You know it must be bad when even the Vietnamese were complaining about the heat!